If You Desire - Cole Kresley (читать книги полностью без сокращений бесплатно .TXT) 📗

Chapter Nineteen

"MacCarrick, it's been too long," Lysette said, closing the door behind them.

"Do you have information about Grey, or no'?" Hugh's voice was still rough from the pleasure of kissing Jane, his mind still in turmoil.

When Jane had been pleading before, Hugh had looked into her eyes and seen something he'd never expected. She hadn't been pleading with him…tostop . She'd wanted him to take her, had beenasking him to.

Never. Never was it supposed to be a variable that Jane might desire me back.

He strode to the whiskey decanter and helped himself, then stared down into the liquid. He'd counted on the fact that even if he lost control, Jane would remind him with a stiff-wristed slap that she would not welcome his attentions. Without that check, he was doomed.

"No pleasantries?" Lysette said. When he turned an unbending look on her, she asked blithely, "Why would I have information about Grey?"

Women and their games.Hugh was sick of them. "Because you slept with him for years. And I know you've been keeping tabs on him since he left you."

Her look turned calculating. "If you want to know anything about Grey, then tell me whoshe is."

"You owe this to Weyland regardless." Weyland arranged loans for people like her—information gatherers—to open shops and taverns and inns at crossroads all over Europe, like nets. Lysette was good at her job—she was observant and intuitive—and in exchange for information, she made a good living.

"Doesn't Weyland have a daughter named Jane? One who is reportedly lovely."

He swigged, knowing he wouldn't drink more than a glass. "One and the same."

"Now it all makes sense. Everyone expects Grey to strike out at Weyland, and you show up here married to his daughter, taking her out of London. You'd do just about anything for the old man. Apparently, you'll brook a marriage in name only."

"So sure it's a marriage of convenience?"

"Yes, when I find you here inmy room—away from your new bride." When he only drank again, Lysette said, "Grey told me once that you were in love with her."

Whohadn't Grey told? How many people pitied him his feelings for Jane Weyland? Christ, JaneMacCarrick . Hell, he pitied himself for how much he liked the sound of that. "Grey said a lot of things that were no' true. You of all people should know that."

"It's obvious she's playing with you. That one cares nothing for you."

"And why would you say that?" he asked, striving for an uninterested tone.

"When I was flirting with you earlier, she looked at me as if she was amused. The last thing women regard me with is amusement, especially when I'm draped over their husbands."

"Perhaps she's confident."

"Arrogant."

Possibly.

"You reach too high with that one."

"Lysette, you are the third person today to express that exact sentiment. It's ingrained." Ethan, Bidworth, Lysette. Hell, even Jane's servants recognized the divide between him and Jane.

Lysette approached him, running her finger down his chest. It left him cold, and he drew her hand away with an expression of distaste, but her other hand was busy easing his shirttail from his trousers. "You should be riding a woman tonight. Even if the arrogant English chit would let you, she still wouldn't be woman enough for a man like you."

Lysette had no idea. He'd had a glimpse of Jane's unfettered passion just moments ago, and it had staggered him.

Hugh exhaled and took her wrist, removing her hand. "Doona speak badly of her in front of me. We were friends long before this. Besides, I took a vow." Until their marriage was annulled, he'd keep it.

She pouted. "You'd deny yourself for a marriage of convenience? When I've been attempting to seduce you for years?"

Hugh had noticed her flirtations. Might even have taken her up on it. She had all the qualifications—in other words, she looked nothing like Jane. But she'd been sharing his friend's bed, and Hugh had never needed it badly enough to lose his head as some did.

"Let me give you what she won't. Or can't." Her voice went low. "I can do things to your body that will make you wonder how you've lived without me for so long."

Here he had a willing, attractive, and, apparently, wicked bed partner who'd gladly accept a night with him. And the only desire he had was that Jane would give a damn if he did it. Lysette ran the tip of her tongue over her bottom lip, gaze locked on him.

Knowing what he'd just come from, he felt vaguely insulted at Lysette's interest. He still had Jane's taste on his lips and could almost still feel her warm, soft flesh against his tongue. Hugh had learned long ago that it was of little use trying to find a substitute for her.

He set the glass down. "If you're no' going to give me information on Grey, then I've no other reason to be back here."

"Where are you going?"

"Back to my arrogant English chit. Who could teach you a thing or two about seduction."

"You're still in love with her," she said stiffly. "You're different. Already." She gave a humorless laugh. "You're satisfied with the mereidea that she is yours." When Lysette cast him a pitying look—yet another to add to the count today—Hugh wanted to roar that Jane had wanted him, too.

He turned to the door.

"Oh, Hugh. You stupid man! People like her don't want people like us. I know this. Your Jane Weyland might flirt, she might even desire you. But you'llnever have her heart."

He bit out over his shoulder, "JaneMacCarrick ." For however long.

"And what happens when she finds out you're a cold-blooded killer?"

He slowed.

"What will she think of you then?"

He couldn't imagine. Killing as a soldier was a celebrated thing. Even the mercenary she thought him sounded better than an assassin. Assassins hid and struck from the shadows. That's what people believed. Generally that was true, but Hugh had also had to fight for his life more times than he wanted to remember.

He feared that even if she could get past all the killing he'd done, fierce Jane still might find his means…cowardly.

"Even if she wanted you, you can't go back to a life like the one she lives."

Lysette was right. The odds were against Hugh ever settling back into society, finding those day-to-day rhythms. They called itreverting —when battle-weary soldiers or assassins too long in the field went back to civilian life and somehow made a go of it. It was extremely rare, especially for someone like Hugh, who had always been adrift in social situations anyway.

Just as he'd made it out of the doorway, stabbing his shirttail into his pants, she said, "Hugh, wait!" She hurried over to him, putting her hand on his chest to stay him. "Grey reached France this week."

He shut the door behind them once more. "How do you know?"

"Because the woman I solicited help from to keep tabs on him showed up dead there."

"Does no' mean—"

"Her throat was slashed so violently, her head nearly came off."

Grey. No doubt of it. "He's out of his mind."

"Even so, he's still lethal. And he hates you and Ethan for what you did to him."

"You were right in league with us," Hugh was quick to remind her.

"But something else happened that night. What did you do to him?"

"I've no sodding idea," he lied, finding it easy with her.

"If he's coming after Jane, it's just a matter of time before he finds you two."

"He'll seek you out as well, Lysette. You canna reason with him, and he's beyond saving. I hope you're prepared."

"I will be." Her expression resigned, she said, "Aren't we a pair? A coquette about to be taken down by an assassin, and an assassin about to be taken down by a coquette."

When Hugh returned to their room, Jane lay curled up in bed with nearly all the lamps out, though he could tell by the tenseness of her form that she was still awake.