How to Be a Pirate - Cowell Cressida (читать книги онлайн без txt) 📗

Hiccup repeated this to himself over and over again as they trudged towards the continuous noise of the whistle.

[Image: Men and a dragon.]

"Please don't let it be Snotlout, PLEASE don't let it be Snotlout, please, please, PLEASE don't let it be Snotlout...."

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11. THE TREASURE OF GRIMBEARD THE GHASTLY

Of course it was Snotlout who had found the treasure.

There he stood, chest stuck out, nostrils flaring, a big fat smile on his smug face. Fireworm, his dragon, had blown up to nearly twice her size with pride.

He was surrounded by a crowd of Vikings, who were giving him the Hooligan Hoorah: "SNOT-LOUT SNOT-LOUT SNOT-LOUT, UGH UGH UGH."

Snotlout grinned even more widely when he saw Hiccup trudging up, trying to look inconspicuous (difficult when you are attended by a friend carrying a gigantic limpet).

"Look what I've found, Hiccup," drawled Snotlout.

Snotlout had found a large wooden chest, very battered and scuffed and thoroughly gnawed by Skullions. It had the words " PROPERTY OF GRIMBEARD THE GHASTLY DO NOT OPEN" written on it in large golden letters.

Hiccup sighed. No chance of it NOT being the treasure, then.

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"Righto then," said Stoick, rubbing his hands together in a businesslike fashion. "Let's open it."

Hiccup forgot about shutting up and keeping a low profile.

"Father," he whispered urgently, "we can't open it here. Look, it says 'DO NOT OPEN' on the front. Remember what happened last time?"

"NONSENSE," bellowed Stoick, who had never been more disappointed by his son. Why hadn't HE found the treasure? WHAT was his odd-looking friend doing carrying that ridiculously large shell?

Now Baggybum was going to start suggesting that Snotlout was the rightful Heir to the Tribe, and then Stoick would have to shut him up by fighting him, and it was all Hiccup's fault.

"Of course we open it NOW. What's the point of looking for treasure if you can't open the box when you find it?"

"Please," pleaded Hiccup, "you don't think a cunning old pirate like Grimbeard the Ghastly is going to leave a box lying around without there being some sort of trick to it? It'll be BOOBY-TRAPPED. Look what happened when Alvin opened the coffin in the first place -- it chopped off his hand -- and then

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when we opened it later everybody nearly died of fright...."

Stoick finally lost his temper with his son.

"WHO is in charge here, anyway?" he roared. "I am the Chief of the Hairy Hooligans, not you, you small boy."

Hiccup flinched.

"Those were coincidences, not BOOBY TRAPS.

[Image: A man and a dragon.]

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And I am not going to lug a great heavy box like this one all the way home only to find it's full of stones."

Stoick's eyes were already bright with a strange greedy light that Hiccup had never seen before.

"Good point, Chief," said Gobber the Belch. "May I?" Gobber swung his axe way over his head and brought it down on the chains wrapped around the box, snapping them in two.

"Snotlout should open it, as HE found it," said Baggybum the Beerbelly.

Stoick sighed. "Okay then," he said.

Snotlout proudly stepped forward. This was his big moment.

He shot a nasty look at Hiccup.

"Not a good idea, NOT a good idea, NOT A GOOD IDEA," said Hiccup and Fishlegs to themselves as Snotlout reached out tattooed muscly arms towards the box....

HOT A G-G-GOOD IDEA," said Toothless, closing his eyes as Snotlout slowly lifted up the lid....

c r-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-a-k....

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[Image: The door.]

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12. ESCAPE FROM THE ISLE OF THE SKULLIONS

The chest was not full of stones.

It was full to the brim with a gorgeous treasure. Strings of jewels, golden cups, objects more dazzlingly bright than anything the Hooligans had ever seen before.

"Is it s-s-s-safe to look, n-n-n-ow?" asked Toothless, still with his eyes shut.

Hiccup opened his eyes. "I think so," he said uncertainly.

He had drawn his sword as Snotlout opened the chest, and now he peered in.

"It seems," he said suspiciously, "it seems to be just a box full of treasure."

"OF COURSE it is," said Stoick. "What did I tell you? No BOOBY TRAPS. You have too much imagination, my boy. Sometimes you have to leave things to the experience of your elders and betters."

Snotlout had already reached in and drawn out a truly magnificent sword, the scabbard richly decorated with dragons, skulls and the waves of an angry sea.

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THAT was a sword fit for a Pirate King. It made the soft hiss of a serpent as Snotlout gently drew it out of the scabbard, and as the sunlight glinted on the still-bright, cruel blade, you could see how bitingly sharp it was, even after all these years underground.

On the handle was a furious portrait of Thor the Thunderer with a tangled seaweedy beard, and across the blade was a zigzag lightning pattern in a lighter silver.

"The Stormblade ...," breathed Baggybum the Beerbelly.

It was, indeed, the Stormblade, Grimbeard the Ghastly's famous sword, with which he had ruled over the entire Inner Isles in such a ruthless fashion.

As Snotlout waved it gently to and fro, it seemed to give off a fierce, hungry light of its own.

Gently, Stoick reached over and took it from his nephew.

"MINE, I think you'll find," said Stoick calmly. "The Stormblade belongs to the CHIEF of the Hairy Hooligans, and to him ALONE."

There was a crafty, greedy look in his eye as he threw aside his own sword and took hold of the Stormblade.

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Toothless wrinkled his snout and sniffed.

"What's that s-s-s-s-smell?"

"What smell?" asked Hiccup.

"THAT smell," replied Newtsbreath, making a face.

Hiccup looked across at Fireworm, the greatest sniffer of them all. The normally flame-red dragon was drooping on Snotlout's shoulder, an extraordinary shade of pale green.

"Suffering scallops!" shouted Hiccup.

[Image: A dragon.]

"The Skullions!!! SHUT THE BOX!" and he launched himself at the box lid, trying to shut it.

"The boy's gone crazy," said Baggybum the Beerbelly, easily preventing Hiccup from shutting it by holding it open with one massive forefinger.

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"Crazy with jealousy," sneered Snotlout.

"SHUT THE BOX! SHUT THE BOX! SHUT THE BOX!" yelled Hiccup, struggling in Baggybum's arms.

"Now, now, my boy," said Stoick, irritated, but trying to soothe his son, "you can find some treasure NEXT time, I'm sure. We're quite safe, the Skullions can't see us or hear us...."

"But they can SMELL us!" shouted Hiccup. "GRIMBEARD HAS BOOBY-TRAPPED THE BOX WITH A SMELL THAT WILL WAKE THE SKULLIONS!!!"

"What do you mean, smell us?" asked Stoick.

[Image: A man.]

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He gave an experimental sniff. Now the stench was so strong even the humans were noticing it. Fireworm had already thrown up in the heather. All the Hooligans started sniffing, and there it was, an unmistakable reek of rotting fish and long-dead walrus ... with perhaps a hint of month-old crabmeat.

"POOH," murmured the Hooligans, their attention wandering from the treasure.

"SHUT ... THE ... BOX!" yelled Hiccup, purple in the face from fury at their stupidity. Light dawned on Stoick the Vast's stupid countenance.

"Ahhhhh ... I see what you mean.... SHUT THE BOX. Quickly, quickly!" At last he realized the urgency of the situation and shut the box, sitting on it for good measure.