In Chimney Corners - McManus Seumas (книги онлайн бесплатно .txt) 📗

“Why, yer highness,” says Jack, “sure I’ll do my best, and the best can do no more.”

Jack and his father went home; the father very downhearted entirely, seein’ that there didn’t seem to be any chance for poor Jack at all; and he thought he’d see him burned, beheaded, and hung before his eyes the next night.

Jack didn’t say much, but went to bed and slept sound. He was up with the lark next mornin’, and away out through the fields. He searched the meadows till he come on a hare asleep, and catching it he broke one of its legs, and fetched it home with him. The king sent out the two horses according to his promise to plough the tattie field, and he sent with them two men armed to the teeth, who had sthrict ordhers that Jack Brogan would attempt to stale the horses out of the plough that day, but they weren’t to allow him on the paril of their lives, but were to shoot him if he thried; and if they allowed him to stale the horses, they would be hung to the first bush themselves. Well, of course, they had their eyes about them, and ploughed, and ploughed away till evening, and no sign of Jack; so they agreed that Jack had too much wit to run the risk of gettin’ shot, that he had given up the thing in despair, and had gone and dhrownded himself. With that they sees a hare with a broken leg coming over the ditch, and away limpin’ across the field before them. Whirroo! both of them throws down their guns and swords and afther that hare for bare life. They didn’t go far till they caught it, but when they come back the horses was gone, as clane as if they had nivir been there, and Jack was half roads to the castle with them. He met the king at the gate and handed him over his horses.

“Well, Jack,” said the king—and I can tell you he opened his eyes wide when he sees Jack marchin’ up to him with the horses—“well, Jack,” says he, “ye done that cliverly, but them rascals have been too slack with ye, and I’ll take ye in hands myself now. The second thing ye’ll have to do—and it’s no miss—is to steal the sheet that will be undher myself and the queen when we are sleeping to-morrow night. I’ll keep my hand on a loaded gun all night, and the first man enthers my room I’ll shoot him dead, and if ye don’t succeed in stalin’ it, ye know what’ll happen ye. What do you think of that, Jack?”

“Well,” says Jack, “I’ll do my best, and sure ye know the best can do no more.”

Then the king was off to ordher out his sojers to hang the two men, and away went Jack home, and you may be sure his father was proud to see him back safe, but when Jack tould him the second thrial, he got down-hearted again, and said he’d surely lose his boy this time.

Jack said nothin’, but went to his bed and slept sound that night again; and the next night he went to the graveyard and dug up a fresh corp about the same age as himself, and taking it home he dhressed it in a shoot of his own clothes, and started for the castle in the middle of the night, and gettin’ undher the king’s bedroom window, he hoisted up the corp, and at the same time threw gravel again the panes.

“What’s that?” says the king, jumping up in his bed; and seeing the head at the window he fired, and Jack, with that, let the corp fall.

“Ha, ha,” says the king, “I was too able for ye, Jack, my boy; ye’re done for at length, and it’s yer desarvin’. Now, queen,” says he to her ladyship, “I’ll have to run out and bury this corp.”

Jack waited till he saw the king safe away with the corp, and then he climbed in of the window.

“You weren’t long away, king,” says her ladyship from the bed.

“Oh,” says Jack, purtendin’ the king’s voice, “I kem back for the sheet to wrap up the corp in an’ carry him to the graveyard.”

And sure enough, she hands it to him to wrap round the corp, and me brave Jack steps out of the window and away with him.

It wasn’t long afther till the king come in with his teeth chattherin’, and steps into bed.

“Where’s the sheet?” he cried, jumpin’ up as soon as he missed it.

“Why, ye amadan,” says the queen, “didn’t ye come back and say you wanted it to wrap up the corp and carry it to the graveyard.”

“Oh, Jack—Jack,” says the king, lying back in his bed again, “you have thricked me wanst more! But, plaise Providence, that will be the last time.”

Next day Jack come to the castle with the sheet rowled up an’ ondher his arm, and presented it to the king.

“Well, Jack,” says the king, smilin’, “ye done me again, but the third time, ye mind, is the charm. To-morrow night I’ll sleep with all my clothes, as well as my shoot of mail, on me, and you’re to steal this inside shirt (showing it to him) that has my name written on the inside of the breast of it, ye persave, off my back, and leave another shirt on me in its place, and I’ll have a loaded gun in every hand all night, and there’ll be a senthry at every window in my house, and two at every door, and my bedroom will be filled with sodgers; and if ye don’t succeed, ye know what’ll happen ye. Eh, what do you think of that, Jack?”

“Why,” says Jack, says he, “sure I’ll do my best, and the best, ye know, can do no more.”

Now Jack’s father was jumpin’ out of his skin with delight when he found that Jack stole the sheet, but when Jack come home this night, an’ tould his father that he had to steal the inside shirt, with the king’s name on the inside of the breast, off the king’s back, and leave another in its place unknownst to him, while he slept with all his clothes as well as a shoot of mail on him, and a loaded gun in every hand, and with a senthry at every window, and two at every door, and the room full of sodgers, faix Jack’s father’s heart gave way again entirely, and he said that Jack was as good as lost to him now, anyhow.

Jack said nothing but went to bed and slept sounder now than ever he did, and getting up betimes in the mornin’ he went to a tailyer and got him to make a shirt of the same description, and of the very same cloth as the king’s inside shirt; and he got the tailyer to prent something in the inside of the breast of it—but what it was we’ll not say now. In the middle of the night he rowled up the shirt, and buttoning it up inside his coat, he stharted for the castle. When the senthries seen him comin’, they ups with their guns to shoot him, when he shouted out not to mind, for that he was comin’ to give himself up, seein’ that it was no use in him endayvourin’ to do what was onpossible to be done. So, they got round him, and takin’ him into the castle, they fetched him to the king’s bedroom, where they wakened the king, and told him that Jack had give in at last and couldn’t do it.

“Why, Jack,” said the king, laughin’ hearty, “I knew I would be one too many for ye. Ordher up the hangman at once till we get through with this business.”

“Oh, aisy, aisy, if ye plase,” said Jack, “sure this was nothin’ but a joke of me. I have the shirt already stolen off yer back, and another in its place.”

The king swore this was onpossible, and the sojers till a man swore the same, but the king, knowin’ Jack was so able, thought it betther not to shout till he was out of the wood; so he pulled off him till he reached the shirt.

“There it is yet, Jack, ye see,” says he.

“Is that it?” says Jack. “Is yer name in it?”

“To be sure it is,” says the king, readin’ it.

“Show me,” says Jack; and turnin’ round to the light to read the name, purtindin’, he slips it undher his coat in the winkin’ of a midge’s eye, and whips out the other shirt. “Ay, sure enough,” says Jack, handin’ back his own, “that’s it all right. So I suppose ye may as well get up the hangman and let us finish off the business at wanst.

“Sartinly, Jack,” says the king, gettin’ himself into the shirt and clothes again, “sartinly; delays is dangerous.”

But, lo and behould you! when the hangman was got and everything was prepared, the king asked Jack if he had anything to say before h’ed die.